what is peacefuL parenTing?
Peaceful parenting refers to a practical framework devised by globally renowned parenting expert, Dr Laura Markham. It advocates the concept of authoritative parenting - giving our children high levels of warm support to meet the high expectations we set for them - which decades of research have shown leads to the best long-term outcomes for children. This relationship-based parenting model also incorporates several science-backed skills and concepts, which all tie together to create a hugely impactful toolkit of parenting practices.
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In a nutshell, the research-based, parent-tested peaceful parenting model is about three simple ideas:
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1 / Regulating your own emotions
Peaceful parenting encourages and supports parents to regulate their own emotions before they react, so that they can best respond to their children’s needs. This is mindfulness in action.
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2 / Connecting with your Child
Connection is really the only influence parents have to encourage their children to want to cooperate with expectations. When a child is not being cooperative, peaceful parenting suggests parents focus on creating more warm connection. Connection is what makes this whole parenting thing worthwhile, plus it deepens the parent-child relationship from childhood, through the teen years and into adulthood.
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3 / Coaching not Controlling
When parents accept their child's emotions and support them while still empathetically holding high, developmentally appropriate limits relating to their behaviour, children learn that, while they may not always get what they want, they get something better - a parent who loves them no matter what. Research demonstrates that coaching is the foundation of emotional intelligence, instils an inner moral compass, and is much more effective than punishment, bribery and threats.
A peaceful parent believes that their child is doing the best they can
and, if they are not meeting expectations, that they will do better with more support.
A peaceful parent works hard to figure out what that support might be.
A parent coach can be an invaluable help with this.
Some of the concepts and fields of research which inform Peaceful Parenting include:
You can learn more about peaceful parenting at https://www.peacefulparenthappykids.com/#learnmore and sarahrosensweet.com.
Both Laura Markham and Sarah Rosensweet offer peaceful parenting online courses on a regular basis, and Laura has published three indispensable books on the subject.
You can find links to these resources and more on my resources page.